Insomnia and nightmares

[ellen_datlow]

I had insomnia last night for the first time in awhile--I think I may have drunk some very strong iced coffee (from morning leftovers) too late in the evening. I finally got to sleep then this morning was awakenend by my alarm clock by a nightmare. My dreams are rarely very detailed and I hardly ever dream in color so they're often kind of vague. Thinking about it now I realize it wasn't such a horrible dream and it's sooooo obvious. (most of my dreams deal with things that are consciously or subconsciouly troubling m):

I was walking with some friends in the horror field and then ran into some friends from the science fiction field. I was torn between the two groups and ending up being separated from the horror people. I and the sf folk went into a building where we were on some sort of entertainment reality show. I was chosen (or not) for something and escorted upstairs. The person upstairs was being very nice to me and explaining something and I woke up....It's funny, but relating it now I can't see why it was upsetting to me but at the time I KNEW it was a nightmare.

I don't need interpretations because it's obvious (and I did Jungian therapy for 3 years when I was in my late 20s): As an sf/f/h editor I am torn among the three fields --although consciously I think this is a good thing. Perhaps subconsciously I worry about it.... As far as the reality show: I'm terrified of "performing" ie. giving speeches. (yes, I'm fine with panels, discussions, interviews, workshopping, and the like--as long as I'm not alone up there and performing)....

Now I feel dumb. Is this really what people post about on their blogs? (I'll try to not do it too often! :-) )

Comments

Re: I have plenty of those.

[ellen-datlow.livejournal.com]

I've had a few recurring dreams, too. One is the telephone booth in which I cannot dial the number right no matter how many times I try. Another is (not so much any more) the old performance dream: I can't remember my lines when I'm on stage and the old math anxiety dream: I can't do the math. It's always a relief to wake up and remember: no, I am NOT in a play and no, I never ever have to take a math test again. The telephone...well, I do that on occasion even on push button phones ;-)

wow!

[themadblonde]

I am SO GLAD that I am not the only one w/ anxiety dreams about dialing a telephone! Usually is an old round dial & I'm in some kind of frantic hurry, often to the point of sobbing w/ frustration.

Why can't I have flying dreams like everybody else? ;-)

Re: wow!

[ellen-datlow.livejournal.com]

Yup. That's the one. I've rarely had flying dreams :-(